New York state of mind, Misty Sunday

 

It's Sunday.  A heavy cool mist envelops our morning.  I only want to snuggle a kitty and sip some hot tea but any time now the kids will arrive for Sunday brunch. I love brunch with the kids but this morning all the points have combined for a time machine trip back to the 1970's. I suppose it helped that Steely Dan was playing on the radio...

I'm gazing out a window of a brick apartment building somewhere in New York City. The group of well-meaning hippie types I was with were in various stages of their morning rituals. I was just taking in the moments, and imagining a different life. The was a green between the buildings. I don't remember if there were small trees or not, maybe bushes, but it was misty and cool. The cool and damp wafted in through an open window and was most welcome. I was snug in my turtleneck jersey. The rest of my companions were gathering their things and preparing to leave the brick sanctuary. Secretly, I wished to stay, remake my life. There was something there, I couldn't quite put my finger on, an idea or feeling, a longing. No time for imagining and soon enough we were all in our camper and heading north out of the city to what had become home. 

Looking back I don't remember any particular connection to the owner of the apartment. Maybe they were a friend of someone in our group. That apartment and all the tiny points of memory created there wedged into the storybook of my twenties. comes to the surface every now and then. They pull me back to when my time belonged to something other than me. Where a kitty snuggles and hot cups of tea were by chance not choice. I suppose it was a window to discovery that I'd been peering out of. Perhaps it was a tiny chink in the wall around me where I began to discover what I wanted and tried to hear it from deep within. Maybe I had found a chapter of a previous existence, who knows? 

When the radio plays that 70's semi-rock, jazz fusion music and when forces combine to recreate the same type of weather, I find myself there. I'm staring out the window and wondering if I made it.